5 Ways to NOT Get 'UnFriended' Fast in Social Media!

We have all seen the posts, the ones that cause us to pause and scratch our head. Those posts online from people that clearly didn't edit their content before hitting the Share/Send button. You know the ones. Those that leave you in a state of shock and awe, or just plain flabbergasted. Or leave you asking, "why!?"

Today I had that experience with an online post from someone who is connected to one of my networks. Though this post wasn't as much a head scratcher as it was rude and down right angry, it was shocking just the same. Perhaps this person was having a bad day, or they woke up on the wrong side of the bed. At the end of the day, it doesn't really matter because the impression they left not only on me, but those in our network, had catastrophic affects.

They left an indelible mark on our minds, not of the excellent services they may or may not provide, but that they are not friendly, rather disrespectful of others publicly and down simply...angry. All that from one comment on a post.

Something to always remember when posting online, in a network, on Facebook or Twitter, what you put out there for even a few to see, can go viral and take you down quickly or raise you to new heights.

To ensure that you always put the best post forward, and refrain from getting 'unfriended' abruptly, consider these tips for posting success.

1.) Never respond or post in haste. It is key to check your attitude at the proverbial door before you comment or post anything. If you are feeling edgy or angry as you type. delete. delete. delete.

2.) Put your best face forward. Always remember that when you post online in the various networks that you play in, your image as well as your words go forward for all to see. The reader may or may not remember your name, but they are highly likely to remember your face. And if the words associated with your face are negative, the impression lasts a life time.

3.) Consider the PAUSE button. If you engage in a reply or post that is rather harsh in nature, pause and step away from the screen. Those quick posts can have long lasting effects that can be insurmountable or cause you to lose those hard earned followers. Your words are an extension of you online, pick them wisely.

4.) Transparency is good and can be bad. We hear it all the time, 'be transparent' online. This is a good rule to follow however, it can also come back to bite you in the you know what. Being transparent online and showing your flaws can engage people positively or negatively. It is all in how you handle it that counts. If you post something that didn't translate well, then state that and correct the action. If you post something that contradicts what you 'say' you represent, and don't quickly correct it, that loses credibility. Speak the truth and make corrections as needed is key.

5.) Keep Friends and Business in different containers. When posting online, it is important to show all networks your friendly side, that you care to engage, to connect, and to collaborate. To show you are not just there for shameless promotion. However, when posting the events (with details and pictures) of your weekend escapade on the same profile that you post ways prospects can engage you for business services, can get dicey. It is important to keep friends and all the activities you enjoy with them in the 'friend zone' and keep business in the online board room. Mixing the two can work against you at the most inopportune times.

There are other ways to keep you free and clear from the 'UnFriend' zone and it may be good to explore them. The key is to use the various platforms wisely and consider this, if you have children (or a grandmother), would you be proud to have them read or see what you post?


Coaching Questions:

* What is your social media strategy to connect, collaborate and grow?

* How might having a business persona and personal in the same network work for or against me?

* What do I value about being transparent online and how can it work to promote my persona?

* When faced with a negative encounter online, how will I handle it that supports my values?

The World is Conspiring Against Me!

Have you ever thought that the world is conspiring against you? Well there have been times in life and business that I have. I mean, let's be truthful here. We have all been faced with what seem to be insurmountable obstacles in our path and as we strive for direction or clarity, we can get discouraged.

We even wonder what on earth did we do to deserve ______(fill in the blank) and how are we going to get beyond it? For business owners, this can be an ongoing dance between joy and emotional turmoil, wondering what is going to happen next. The trap in getting stuck in a place like this is that we often start making decisions out of fear vs. logic. We allow our emotions to be the driver instead of our vision and plan.

Several of the clients that I have coached come to me because they are feeling stuck on the merry-go-round of discouragement and fear-filled decision making. This is a recipe for catastrophe if not addressed at the root level. The root level is what got us to that place to begin with, so we must go there to change it. To uncover what 'it' is means taking time to reflect on what has happened and reconstruct next steps so that, we don't keep recreating the same old situation. We must always remember that if we are making a decision based out of fear, it is probably the wrong decision.

So, you may be asking yourself, 'great Tammy, I get the fear piece but I still don't get the why?' Well that is an interesting question, and one that people ask all the time. "Why is this happening to me." It is in those moments that you feel the world is conspiring against you - right? I say, the world is conspiring not against you, but conspiring to make you a Success! There are no accidents in life or business. We can learn from every meeting, encounter, employee or vendor that we come in contact with. It is the way we look at those Giants or Mountains in our path that make the difference.

3 Tips for facing those Giants and moving those Mountains

1. Reflect on where you've been
   You want to pause and look backward to correct course moving forward. It also aids in noticing how those things which seemed to be obstacles weren't really in the way, they were there for my protection.
   
2. Hit is head on
   That's right, no fancy footwork will get you out of it, you have to have the courage to stand in the face of it and know beyond all knowing that you were meant for such a time and go for it. Ask yourself, How is this going to make me a success?
   
3. Record - Track - Rehearse
   This is key for future mountains (and they will show up for your success.) When we record what has been, to correct course and track our steps moving forward, it supports us staying on the path according to our plan, and lessens the fear based decision making. Now combine it with rehearsing what will be in the future - create a new picture and attach yourself to it and those giants seem much less intimidating and the mountain more like a hill.
   

We limit ourselves by allowing fear to rule our world rather than shifting the way we look at things to envision what we want and aligning our steps to follow. Vision is necessary, and showing up as we want to be seen is key.

So the next time you feel a conspiracy is mounting...take a proactive approach and shift your mindset to one that supports where you want to go. Remember, you can make change without improvement, but you can't make improvement without change.

Tammy Redmon
Executive Coach and Business Growth Strategist
Redmon & Associates - Empowering Today's Business Leaders